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Survey on aging and death shows that two-thirds of Americans have yet to prepare a will, include half of seniors.
In a Nutshell
What matters most: 80% of Americans care more about their impression on loved ones than leaving a mark on the world (54%)
Mental shifts with age: 82% notice changes in how they think as they get older, focusing more on relationships and making each day count
The conversation problem: Only 50% have discussed end-of-life wishes with loved ones, despite deep family focus
NEW YORK — Getting older changes everything, including what we care about most. A new survey of 2,000 Americans reveals that while 54% want to leave their mark on the world, 80% care far more about the impression they make on their loved ones. When it comes to aging, love wins over legacy every time.
The Talker Research survey shows that 82% of Americans notice their thinking shifts as they get older. One person said they no longer “sweat the small stuff,” while another realized that “time’s the real currency.” Many are making a point to “fit more in life each day.”
Americans think about aging roughly five times per week, with 18% reflecting on it daily. Rather than dwelling on decline, this awareness seems to sharpen their focus on what truly matters.
How Aging Changes What Americans Value Most
The mental changes that come with age translate into real behavioral shifts. As people grow older, 61% appreciate small things more, while 53% deliberately savor good moments instead of rushing through them. Nearly half (49%) see beauty in life more clearly than before, and 45% are determined to make every day count.
When Americans think about getting older, maintaining close relationships with friends and family tops their list of goals (50%). Other priorities include watching their family grow (42%), leaving inheritances for loved ones (36%), and ensuring their family’s financial security (35%).
These priorities drive action. Most Americans (58%) have received meaningful items passed down from family members, such as “a vintage family photo album,” “a handmade quilt passed down from my mother remind[ing] me of her warmth and care,” and their “great grandfather’s watch…He carried it in wartime and it is engraved.”
Looking ahead, 59% plan to leave something behind for their families, with parents more likely to do this than non-parents (68% vs. 45%). The items people plan to pass down range from practical to sentimental: money, cars, jewelry, heirloom furniture, sports card collections, houses, lasting memories, strong values, stocks, pictures, life insurance, artwork, and even sword collections.
Why Most Families Avoid End-of-Life Conversations
Despite caring deeply about their families, only half of Americans have discussed end-of-life wishes with their loved ones. Parents do slightly better than non-parents (56% vs. 41%), but the numbers remain low across the board.
“Just 45% of adults revealed they’ve spoken about their ‘last wishes’ with a loved one,” said Nichole Myers, chief underwriter from Ethos, which commissioned the survey. “Parents particularly expressed a bit more worry. But whether or not you are a parent, it’s a good time to start thinking about your ties to the people around you and the legacy you want to leave for them.”
When conversations do happen, they’re usually prompted by natural aging (44%) or preparing a will (33%). Those who avoid the topic cite understandable reasons: 28% don’t want to think about death, 25% say it hasn’t come up naturally, and 25% believe it’s too early for such discussions.
Americans think these conversations should happen around age 53, though 52% believe even that’s too late.
Estate Planning Gap Leaves Families Vulnerable
Perhaps most concerning, nearly two-thirds of Americans (65%) don’t have a will, including about half of seniors. Even among parents, who tend to plan ahead more than others, only 41% have wills compared to 25% of non-parents.
Among those without wills, 58% say better understanding of how to start the process would motivate them to create these documents.
Myers explains why this matters: “The average American mistakenly thinks it takes about eight weeks to wrap up the legalities after a loved one passes away — and that is a significant underestimate. Proper education for how to handle end-of-life proceedings is important. So many are under the impression that it’s a quick process, and the reality is that it can take up to 15 months. To help keep things moving smoothly, people should feel comfortable discussing their wishes with family and friends. Keeping everything organized in an estate plan or a will can help.”
Methodology: Talker Research conducted this study for Ethos between July 23-28, 2025, surveying 2,000 American adults online. Participants came from traditional online panels and programmatic sampling, receiving points as incentives. The research team screened out speeders, inappropriate responses, bots, and duplicate entries. Results reflect people with internet access and carry a 95% confidence level.
Nobody gives a flying leap except for family, specifically spouse and children. That said, even some spouses and children seem to become forgetful with time. In less than 50 years we will ALL be forgotten and relegated to dust and ashes whether or not there is a Heaven or an afterlife.